Six Phone Calls and Counting

16 09 2009

life-insurance

That’s how many time my crazy mama has dialed my phone this week and had the same conversation with me.

“I gotta come up with $79.11 by Wednesday (Winz-dee) or they’re gonna cut my power off.”

“I’m sorry.”

“What had happened was I went crazy with the life insurance. But I figure you’re my only child and I don’t ever want you to have to worry like I do. I’m worth more to you dead than alive now. You’d never have to work again.”

“Stop saying that.”

“But all I need is $70 some dollars, and I’ve called everybody I know, and ain’t nobody got a dime! These people up here are only out for themselves.”

“Well, we all have to take care of ourselves Mom.”

“But I got that policy for you so you could be comfortable. That shows I’m a caring person.”

“I know you are.”

They’d let me pay it on the computer with my account number. They’ll take a credit card or an online check.”

“I pay most of my bills online now, it’s convenient.”

“But I gotta have $79.11 to do it!”

“I know the feeling.”

“You got any extra money?”

“Sure don’t.”

“Well, when I’m dead and gone you will.”

“I gotta get back to work, talk to you later.”

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13 responses

16 09 2009
Amanda

Oh dear.

Maybe the doctor can give her an advance on her paycheck? LOL

16 09 2009
The Vinyl Villager

I suggested that. “I dont start there til next Mun-dee”

16 09 2009
trailerparkbarbie

Yep…that’s YM in true form.
The last time that she was here, she asked me for a gazillion things….stupid things. She saw Gracie’s tiara that she plays dress -up with and asked me for it. I asked her WTH she was gonna do with it and she said that she would WEAR IT!
I didn’t give it to her. One reason was because it belonged to someone else. The other reason was I didn’t want her to embarass anybody by actually wearing it.
She ,also, showed me her “huge tits”….literally….in the flesh with her top pulled up.
Bless your heart!

16 09 2009
The Vinyl Villager

ugh! I think those might be fake. They “appeared” after one of her mens got a settlement.

16 09 2009
Alan

Kinda backwards logic, I suppose…LOL

16 09 2009
The Vinyl Villager

Indeed. First of all, I cant imagine any insurance company writing her a policy for much at all. So I think its all smoke and mirrors and a play to get attention.

16 09 2009
The Incredible Woody

Poor VV! I am terribly impressed with your patience. And your ability to dance around her question!!

Hopefully she hasn’t shown her tits to you:?

16 09 2009
The Vinyl Villager

Not in the flesh!

16 09 2009
cuteasasa

The only good thought I can think of to send your way is that having the phone cut off can’t be too far away.

18 09 2009
trailerparkbarbie

I dunno, VV….I’ve never seen fake boobs that sag like that.

6 10 2009
dawtch

Ewwwwww You had to go there & create that horrible visual!!! When I danced in Florida, we “acquired” a refugee from Homestead. She thought it was cute to go by the name Hurricane…At some point in her past, she had “breast augmentation.” Very augmented…to the tune of probably DD if not EE. The, she either never again wore a bra, or did the pregnancy thing & never wore a bra…the result..? Boobs that were about 10-12 inches long, about 1.2 inch thick for approx 8 of those inches, then a ball (?) (looked like a softball…) hanging there…*shudder* Oh yeah, did I mention the nipples were TRULY on the BOTTOM..? Pointed straight down…

6 10 2009
dawtch

All O can say is Oh My…
bb
dawtch

17 10 2009
Queen of Planet HotFlash

ROFLMAO YOUR MOM MY MIL SISTERS???????????????

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