This one probably comes too late to help the poor soul who did the search, but there is always next year:
“michael jackson-for christmas”
Now, there are two ways to take that query. Did someone want the disgraced King of Pop for Christmas? Or were they on their way to see MJ, Blanket, and the rest of the kooky Jackson clan and found themselves without a gift to take? I’ll assume the latter…to WANT Mr. Jackson for one’s own holiday gift is rather disturbing. Now, I should say right up front that I don’t know him personally, so if you arrived here trying to find a gift idea, you use one of these, and it flops, well…don’t blame me.
But, a few ideas:
1. An ethical plastic surgeon. Clearly, something he needed about 25 years ago, but better late than never.
2. A public relations genius. He really needs one of those. Bad.
3. A Costco-sized bottle of Clorox. To be used on his skin or any laundry items that need the evidence stain removing power of bleach.
4. Some pre-paid legal services. No doubt a gift that will keep on giving.
5. and if none of those work, you’re sure to find something at “Stuff White People Like”
On second thought, aren’t the Jacksons Jehovah’s Witnesses? They don’t celebrate Christmas. Don’t take him anything, it will be offensive if you do!