Introducing a new recurring topic: Search Term Saturdays. Yes, I know it’s probably a bit overdone to write about the funny search terms that bring people to your blog…but I get some truly strange ones and I know the people who pecked away their odd queries arrive here disappointed that they didn’t find the answer they were looking for. It is my duty to assist these poor souls!
In keeping with the spirit of the season:
“Why don’t they sell Christmas Icicles anymore?”
For whoever got here by doing that search, I apologize that the answer wasn’t waiting on you…but if you are still out there, I have that answer now.
BECAUSE THAT SHIT IS TACKY!! They don’t sell them for the same reason they don’t sell station wagons with wood on the side or Harvest Gold appliances anymore. The moment has passed. The time has come and gone. You should have done what my old step-granny did and picked the icicles off of your tree and reused them.
Now, if you MUST have them, I might suggest running a roll of aluminum foil through a shredder to replicate the look. But I will not be responsible if you cut your fingers, ruin your shredder, or if the neighbors laugh at you.