Make Wal-Mart Shopping Fun!

10 11 2008

I hate Wal-Mart with the heat of a thousand tanning beds. I might have more reasons than most people for finding the discount giant to be a boil on the butt of humanity. But, with times being tough and all, I might have to suck it up and go there for the low price. But, thanks to Big Hair Envy, shopping among the cluttered aisles might just be fun! Print this out for your next trip to Wally World:

walmartbingo

Winner gets a treasure trove of Wal-Mart prizes, which may include: a gallon of milk that will go bad before you can get it home, a cheap China-made t-shirt that will turn to lint the first time through the dryer, wilted produce, a Bedazzler, or a signed copy of “Tall Bangs–Classic 80’s Hairstyles for the New Millenium”.

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18 responses

10 11 2008
trailerparkbarbie

May I substitute the very green bananas that turn brown within 12 hours of getting them home for the gallon of milk?

10 11 2008
The Vinyl Villager

TPB–I’m sorry, no substitutions allowed!

10 11 2008
Little Miss

And I’ll be the first to shout “Bingo” in the middle of the aisle and all the people will look at me and wonder what I just won! HAHAHAH. Frikkin Hilarious.

I guarantee you wouldnt be the only one in there talking to yourself!

10 11 2008
The Incredible Woody

It ALMOST makes a trip to Wal-Mart tolerable.

…but not quite

10 11 2008
Peter Parkour

Thinking back to my last trip to Wal Mart I’m pretty sure I could have won before I even made it to the front door. 😛

are you shopping at the one near me?

10 11 2008
thegirlfromtheghetto

Dear God,
Is VV my soul mate? Because I hate Walmart w/a passion!

We went their Saturday night during our road ralley, and their fucking greeter wouldn’t let us bring a camera in the store. however, I did manage to get my friend to pose w/her, even though she was pissed … but hell, it was 50 points and I thought we could out run security. I figured all those part time people are disgruntled and don’t care, but this greeter was a BITCH!!!
couldn’t bring in a camera?? Whats up with that?

10 11 2008
Tammy

I try to go to Walmart after midnight. Just me and the stockers – it’s more bearable that way.

And your bingo card? Holy batshit, vinyl man – do you live in the south? That would work at any State Fair, Gun & Knife show… or many family reunions! Bwahahhaha
I used to try the after midnight trick…but I had an unpleasant encounter in the sheet aisle

10 11 2008
joanharvest

Wal Mart helped put me out of business so I have a special place for Wal Mart in my brain. It’s in the part of my brain where I put everything I hate.

I love the bingo card. Absolutely Fabulous!!

Yeah, that’s another thing I hate about them…they drive out the locally owneds. grrr!

10 11 2008
c

i’ve seen many versions of this bingo card.
There’s sexist bingo, whore bingo, racist bingo, elitist bingo, trashy bingo etc. i’d never seen WalMart bingo though! Hilarious!

My husband works for WalMart. He’d love this.
Also, you forgot “children playing in clothes racks” and “an episode of domestic violence in the parking lot”.
I gotta look up some of those! I can make everyday fun! And sorry, C, but families of employees won’t be eligible to win the prizes. LOL

10 11 2008
dawtch

Yep, I’d hafta say, living literally around the corner from walmart, I’d win it all, every time…oh yeah, and I wanted to say hi.
Hi!
bb
dawtch
no fair…you get the advantage of proximity! hi!

11 11 2008
Jason

HA! This is hysterical. And so true.

But sometimes, when I walk into Wal-Mart, or the 99 cent store, or Hometown Buffet…I get the strange feeling that I BELONG with those people.

Why is that?
Jason, I’m not sure, but I think there are drugs for those feelings.

11 11 2008
~alison

This is great! I can’t wait to shop at WalMart now! Wahoo!
Wal Mart should pay me for drumming up all this business for them!

11 11 2008
Queen of Planet HotFlash

BINGO!!!!!!

12 11 2008
Alan

hahahaha! That’s funny! Now if I can just get these rock bands (AC/DC) from selling their albums there, I would have no reason to EVER go there again!
yeah, what’s with these unholy music alliances?

12 11 2008
MJ

AWESOME.
Im thinking this would make for a great meme–you take your camera and your Bingo card and post the proof that you won! Who’s in?

12 11 2008
Big Hair Envy

Sorry I missed this yesterday. I was shopping at Target.

I believe my entire family has an aversion to WallyWorld. Unfortunately, if they came out with a “Family Reunion” bingo card, we’d all be in BIG trouble:)
I dont know about all Targets, but at mine, you might find all of these things standing in the lone open checkout for 45 minutes

15 11 2008
sista #2

I swear, everytime I am in Walmart, the same obese woman is in front of me in the motorized scooter. get the fuck outta my way bitch.

peace
#2

28 11 2008
Black Friday Shopping Observations and Recipe Recap « Little Miss Sew N Sew

[…] And I forgot my Bingo card. Dangit. […]

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