Dog-gone Crazy!

12 09 2008

Let me start off by saying I am NOT a dog hater. In fact, were it not for the fact that they poop and pee and chew things up, I’d, without reservation, have one or two. Even those things aside, if I had the time to train a pup I’d love to have a little furball to greet me when I come home and ride shotgun as I motor along the highways of the eastern seaboard.

They’re cute. They love you unconditionally. They’re like family. OK, I sort of get that. But some people cross the line between pet lover and just bat shit crazy, “I live for my pet” insanity.

And many of them end up on “House Hunters”. Every other episode seems to feature one of these pet nuts whose main focus in a house hunt seems to be the needs of their pooch (or pooches). These folks are instantly recognizable by their use of such catchphrases as:

“Oh look Honey! Wouldn’t Fluffy love this yard?”

“I don’t know about this light carpet, might be tough with the dogs!”

“This would be a great neighborhood for walking the dog!”

“We were really hoping for a fenced in yard so Fluffy could play.”

“I think we’d have to put some rugs down so Fluffy doesn’t scratch these hardwoods, what do you think honey?”

or, as seen last night, “I don’t know if this kitchen is wide enough, I can see myself tripping over the dog here.” 

(That’s House Hunters hostess Suzanne Whang makin’ fun of these looney pet owners. Ok, not really, but I bet she agrees with me.)

I mean,  give me a friggin’ break!! When little Fluffy is putting in half toward the mortgage, I’ll give a damn what sort of yard, floor coverings, and neighborhood are his preference. Until then, I’m betting he will be perfectly happy to sniff his butt and lick his balls in whatever home I provide.

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14 responses

12 09 2008
Woody

I have to admit that I am one of those “crazy dog people” but thank God I am not that far gone!!

Yes, I do need a fenced yard but have they ever heard of training the dog to not go in the house. Or clipping their nails so they don’t scratch the hardwood! Or putting the dog out while you try to cook!

12 09 2008
Philly

I love my dog also but understand where you are coming from. Most of the time those people on house hunter have NO KIDS!

#1

12 09 2008
The Vinyl Villager

Woody–I understand the fence. My real irritation is that most of these people seem oblivious to the fact that you can put one up if there isnt already one there. The rest–absolutely!!

Philly–you’re right now that I think of it. I can only remember once or twice that it was a family with kids.

12 09 2008
MJ

😀

Pets are like family? I figured it was more of a master/slave relationship.
Me being the slave, of course.

12 09 2008
Woody

Thank God they don’t have kids – imagine what terrors those kids would be!!!

12 09 2008
joanharvest

I have cats and they can pee in any kitty litter box no matter where it is. On the other hand my kids have a dog that they treat like a damn baby. I wish they would have a baby and dump the dog. On their wedding day between the ceremony and reception they had to go home walk it. And this is no fluffy dog it’s a pit bull. She’s a sweet dog but she won’t eat her supper unless one of them is with her. That’s crazy.

12 09 2008
Big Hair Envy

We are pet lovers, but not freaky pet lovers.

My MIL, on the other hand, bought her dog a dress for Easter this year. The whole family planned to be there, and she wanted Precious to look fabulous during the Easter Egg Hunt. I’m certain she has already starting shopping for a Halloween costume for the upcoming celebration!!!

Two years ago, at Christmas, I bought MIL & Precious matching LL Bean monogrammed totes…..not kidding.

12 09 2008
Woody

Big Hair – Snort with laughter!!

12 09 2008
dropofkim

*guiltily hides her dog’s dresses* Dog hater! *shakes fist*

Awww, you know I tease! Unfortunately, I am one of those. I love my baby Tulip! I have an 11 year old girl that has reached the stage where if I even breath around her it is totally embarrassing. I’ve not had a baby with my hubby yet and he got me a mini dachshund and so I think I just have to have something to baby and the cat won’t let me dress her. I ain’t gonna turn down no hardwood floors for her though! I even found a way to get her from being under my feet when I cook. She has her own little stool that she sits on to watch me. 😀 Making you sick yet?

12 09 2008
cuteasasa

At least around here you can’t always fence. A lot of developments do not allow above ground fencing. It apparently disrupts the beauty. My neighbors on both sides are fenced dog owners and wonderful folks. I guess I’ve come to love folks who are okay with the occasional patrol to gather the poo piles from the yard in return for the sweetness that comes from the other end of the stink.

12 09 2008
jason

I never thought of it this way. But you’re kinda right.

13 09 2008
trailerparkbarbie

I guess you’ve heard the news that my dog’s mama just had some more unwanted babies. Maybe, you’d like a couple????? Nothing says “coming home from a hard day” like the smell of fresh dog feces!

14 09 2008
tom

I used to tell my Kids when they wanted a dog, that the best pets were stuffed snoopy dogs or winnie the pooh, because you didn’t have to check them for fleas, they always agreed with you and there were no late stormy night walks for the purposes of defacating somewhere !!

IT WORKED!!

Ok it worked for me cause I never gave in.

15 09 2008
The Vinyl Villager

I had a real dog for about five days once. (Long story)

Now I have a little virtual dog that I can throw a frisbee too, feed, pet, play fetch. And it doesn’t even seem to have an opinion about real estate. LOL!

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