Britain’s Worst Teeth

15 07 2008

If you’ve ever tried to watch TV on a Sunday afternoon (and are not a sports fan) then you know it’s slim pickings.

So imagine my surprise to see listed a program called “Britain’s Worst Teeth”. Thinking to myself…”hmmm…they’re all pretty bad, aren’t they?” I clicked on to see what exactly qualified for the dubious title of Britain’s worst. It should be noted here that this was just before the baby shower that was held at my place, and the guest of honor and I were entertaining each other while everyone else busied themselves with shower preparations.

Now, the BBC describes the show this way: “Britain’s Worst Teeth follows four twenty-somethings with some of the worst teeth in Britain. Their teeth are so bad they affect every aspect of their lives. They are in pain and are embarrassed to go out. They find eating and speaking difficult, and not surprisingly, they find it difficult to attract partners.”

The episode we saw featured a a young brother and sister  who relayed that they hadn’t seen a dentist in at least a decade. The girl had a traumatic experience with a dentist as a child, and the guy had some fear of dentists as well. (I’ll just interject right here that my ass would take a valium, a percocet, or something to get over that fear before I ever let even one tooth look the way these people’s did) These people couldn’t even eat TOAST without screaming in pain. The guy could barely talk.

An image of a mouth came up on the screen…a little yellow…a couple of fillings, but certainly this couldn’t be THE WORST in Britain?? The mother-to-be and I were puzzled. “They aren’t THAT bad…” we remarked. I’m still not sure whose mouth we were looking into at that point.

Because then they showed the girl’s. The only thing that indicated we were looking at teeth was the proximity of a tongue. I am not joking in the least when I say that her molars looked like blue cheese chunks. Mother-to-be and I gagged. “Oh my GOD!” rang through the room. By the time we regained our composure, they were showing the brother’s mouth. As luck would have it,  his mouth can be found on the internet, and it is my duty to present it here (imagine seeing this for the first time on a high-def TV screen):

“Oh god! OH GOD!!” the mother-to-be shouted, “Change the channel!!” I covered my eyes with one hand and searched for the remote with the other. We both gagged and shouted at the site.




Our friends ran in from the kitchen. “Holy hell, what are you screaming about? It sounds like you all are having sex in here!”

I mean, I don’t see how you can save that grille. I think it’s time to pull em and get some dentures. And of course they have trouble attracting a partner! I mean, shit, the only thing that mouth is gonna attract is flies!

So, if you have the stomach to watch the whole episode…let me know what they did for those folks.




20 responses

15 07 2008

Hey, that’s a helluva pic! That’s so disgusting!!!!!

15 07 2008
The Vinyl Villager

Isnt it?? I mean how do you not overcome that dentist fear immediately once even one tooth starts to look anything like that??

15 07 2008
Queen of Planet Hotflash

ommgggggg friggin gawd!!!
I threw up a little in my mouth
Dude you gotta warn a person

15 07 2008

How awful! Oh God I wish we got that show here in El Paso. That was so horrifying, and the gagging and shouting that went on while you searched for the changer was hilarious. And I’m with you, if you’re teeth look that bad what the hell is a little dentist phobia? At least you’ll leave the office looking and feeling better than when you went in. But too late, this mouth cannot be saved. He needs them all taken out immediately and on live TV.
I have BBC and BBC2 I think, do you think I’ll be able to find this wonderfully sickening show?

15 07 2008
The Vinyl Villager

I bet you can Wendy…if you can find it, let me know what they do for these people…

15 07 2008
Big Hair Envy

OK. Do you have any tips for cleaning puke out of a keyboard? Thanks.

15 07 2008
The Vinyl Villager

Queen and BHE…I am so sorry. I should have warned everyone.

BHE…I think a puked in keyboard is as hopeless as that guys teeth…

15 07 2008

That is the nastiest thing I have EVER seen! Thank goodness they didn’t go to the dentist because he would have to take the valium/percocet just to pull those bad boys!!

15 07 2008
The Vinyl Villager

Yeah…can you imagine being some poor dentist or hygienist and having a patient open their mouth to reveal THAT??

15 07 2008

Yuck, barf, puke


11 11 2008
sygar addict UK

hello you weird people lol. how are you this is she the sugar addict . the media make people look bad you know! sugar should come with a warning tho.
Im a mummy and married now days .
Infact having bad teeth is down to the water as well in this county the crap they put in it and the essentials they leave out!
thanks for stoppin’ by! But, darlin, there is nothing the media did to make these people look bad. I mean, unless they rotted their teeth eating the New York Times or something

26 02 2009

well thats for your very grat comment. BUT the FACT is th media are part to blame they cut HALF the truth of the mater out. they filmed so much yet th key point wernt included like the FACT that i was pregnant during filming, like the fact that I had had a bad experience at my dentist and that I was a singer songwriter and that I had managed to do modeling DESPITE awful teeth.
and my life has no way been a box of chocolates – these documentry makers know this but do they inlude my REAL reasons for sugar addiction? NO they just so happen to forget that bit and eave it out. jesus after everything thats happened (although im good at hiding it well) i should be addicted to hard drugs but Im not . so before you bitch about me just think- SARH HILTON

27 02 2009
The Vinyl Villager

Darlin’, if you’re even half as careful with your oral hygiene as you are with your spelling, all this talk of sugar is sorta pointless, isn’t it?

7 03 2009
jenna leach

hey hey hey jenna here the one who was on the show with her bro it not the media it comes down to not lookin after ur teeth im the first to admit that but iv had all ov my teeth caped and got a brill dentist im amazed what they can do these dayz i thank the show for makin a start on helping me im seein sumone and cant stop smiling with my new nasshers lol i just hope people realise how important teeth are thank you to kim and mark for all they did for me

7 03 2009
The Vinyl Villager

Look at this! The stars of the show, all right here on my lil blog. thanks for stoppin by.

13 03 2009

hey if thats really jenna leach- are you on facebook? i have added gemma the other girl. be like a bad teeth reunion lol. glad your teeth are orted now x

As for you MR Vinyl villager- i was drunk when i wrote that so spelling was NOT that great haha. and are you on facebook MR Vinyl guy? lol

13 03 2009

oooh ooops vinyl guy Ive done it again (sorted now not orted) no booze just tiredness maybe i need to go on worst sight in britain lol DEF NOT spelling. hope you Vinyl guy is on facebook as then we can battle it out in WHO HAS THE BIGGEST BRAIN QUIZ lol

13 03 2009
The Vinyl Villager

LOL! sugar addict, you’re cracking me up gal. I AM on Facebook as of today! Search for the Vinyl Villager and you will find me.

29 08 2010

Hello, I met “Sugar Addict” Sarah and thought she was a really lovely person!
I tried to find her but couldn’t so maybe she would like to find me….Daisy Lonnegan on myspace…..take care x x x

29 08 2010

Hello, I am trying to contact Sarah ….. if she would like to contact me it’s Daisy Lonnegan on myspace xx

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