A Message from Mom
31 03 2008 
So I don’t always have the best cell phone reception in my office. Which isn’t necessarily a bad thing. Apparently I missed a call from my mother this morning, because I just had a new voice mail from her that cracked me up.
”Hi handsome! It’s your mommy. I wanted to tell you that Madonna is on the cover of Vanity Fair this month, and I thought you’d want to go out and get yourself a copy.”
God bless her for trying.
1. I didn’t give you permission to use my picture and talk trash about me.
2. Your mom leaves such long messages on my machine that it cuts her off.
3. WTF cares about Madonna anymore?
1. Its not talking trash! Here in the south, we’re proud of our crazy people.
2. Lord, dont I know it. She calls just to hear herself talk anyway, so it hardly matters if theres a live person on the other end.
3. awww…she’s a classic!
1.So, you’re saying that you are proud of all your kin folk? Most of them on the maternal side are pretty nutso. Yes, including me. Certified. Got my crazy papers to prove it.
2.At the end of her message, she says, “May God bless you and have a wonderful day.” (or something to that effect”). She sounds like she belongs in nunnery. Bwahahaha
3. Yes, she is a classic.
2. And the funniest part is…other than to walk down the aisle, I dont think shes ever been in a church.
Funny story…right when she changed her message to that, I thought it was so damned funny that I put my cell on speaker phone and called to let some friends hear it.
Well…long story short, I heard this BEEP from my pocket about 20 minutes later…and we had left my phone on and recorded our hysterical laughter after we “hung up”. The next day she reports that “insert name of most recent ex here” had called drunk from a bar the night before and left a 20 minute message that she couldnt understand.
Your mommy sounds adorable!
I can tell ya something funnier than that. Meg gave her old cellphone to Granny. Somehow, your mom got it. And, she kept hitting a button on it while it was in her purse and calling Frank. I guess Frank was programmed in as number one. She wouldn’t realize it and F & M could hear everything that she was saying and doing. They heard her on a trip to the Dollar Tree. They heard her at a yard sale where she was trying to buy, of all things, some bibbed overalls. This went on for a while. It was funny as hell. I don’t know what happened but she quit calling.
PS Frank got a few calls while he was in meetings at work!